Jacob & Kate H.
I met Jacob our freshman year at Wheaton, first at Honey Rock, then many times over in the Fischer lobby, and further still when we spent a lot of time rolling back and forth in the "fishbowl" chairs as we served together in student government. government. In every interaction with Jacob, I was always, always struck not only by his relentless optimism, but also by his firm belief, real and demonstrated, that there was always more room at the table. We didn't exactly run in the same circles, whatever that means, but we caught up many times over our four years at Wheaton in SAGA and I loved watching what he was creating and dreaming while we were there. He had a beautiful vision of his future that inspired me, and I *saw* it for him. Jacob has been and remains one of the single most inclusive people I have ever come across in my life. He made me feel welcomed and included innumerable times during our four years at Wheaton, and I watched with real joy as he did the same for others.
After Wheaton, I lost touch with him, but bumped into him serendipitously at a coffee shop in Ballard just two weeks after I moved to Seattle. I (thought I) didn't know a single soul in Seattle when I made my spur of the moment move, and at the time I was still looking for a place to live. I was completely out of my depth in every possible sense of the word, homesick, lonely, and terrified. Just seeing Jacob sitting in the shop felt like home. He immediately made room at his table and we spent the next hour catching up. We'd always connected over the books we were reading - at the time, he was reading Haroun and the Sea of Stories by Rushdie, one of my favorite authors. When I remarked I hadn't read it yet, he handed it to me and told me I had to (I still have that copy and just read some excerpts to my son a few weeks ago and thought of Jacob fondly). After about an hour he had to leave. He gave me a big hug, told me he'd have me over soon, and assured me that I was brave and would build a life I loved in Seattle. I cried when he left - I didn't know how much I needed to hear that from someone whose opinion I valued. It took me a few more months, but Jacob's assurances came to pass, and I built a life in Seattle that I never could have dreamed of during that gloomy day in April when we reconnected.
Since then, I found profound joy and pride in watching his life unfold up close. I told all my friends to sign up for St. Lucy's bagel and donut deliveries during COVID and gave the extras I ordered every few weeks to all my neighbors as gifts. Tears ran down my smiling face as I heard of and saw up close his love story with Daniel unfold. I dragged coworkers with me to stand in line in the rain for Howdy many times over as we braved the elements to taste the delicious tartines Jacob and Daniel and the Howdy crew put together at pop ups and eventually the Tacoma Farmer's market. Eventually, I got to bring my own husband, whom I met in Seattle, to taste the incredible Howdy creations and meet my dear friend Jacob. I got to tell him in person that I was expecting my son - he gave me a truly sensational Nutella creation to celebrate.
That's what I'll always remember about Jacob - he was an extraordinary celebrator. He celebrated ideas, he celebrated people, he celebrated the simple, and he celebrated the divine. He knew how to rejoice, and he always made room at his table. I consider myself so lucky to know him, and I'm devastated that the world was robbed of his celebration, joy, and friendship.
